A late night note to me, my soul and I xx

This is me. Who I am. Who I'm supposed to be.

This is a letter to me. To remind me who I am and what I'm here to do.  What lights me up the most.

I just saw the most horrific case of double child neglect on TV.  (A child was neglected and then in turn neglected her own child ad a teenage parent) it lead to the death of a beautiful baby. My heart broke and I sobbed. For the dead baby, for the teenage child mother. For the abuse she suffered and for the life which led her to treat her children in the way she did. My soul screamed at me.... help the girls. HELP THE GIRLS.

I've always maintained throughout my journey that I wanted to help people.  That has never ever changed.  But each new situation and as each layer of my ego falls away, I'm presented with more and more heartbreaking stories of how young girls, teenagers, are suffering. Their life experiences are so screwed up that they're pushed further into their dark.

It makes me so mad that their lights aren't shining brightly.


My light was dimmed.  Not in horrific circumstances, but over time. It was more gradual. And I thank God that it was. Because if my path had been different,  I wouldn't feel their pain like I do. I wouldn't empathise and feel their desperation. I wouldn't hear this call inside me.

I'm ashamed, that for a long time, I've had a smidgen of snobbery about who I want to help. Maybe it's not so much snobbery, but fear keeping me safe and stopping me from dreaming too big.

This all has to change.

A while back I had a small glimmer of an idea about setting up a refuge or a charity or some kind of centre. Where I could have a team of staff doing amazing work. All for free. Going out into communities. Helping teenage girls. Inspiring them.
But I dimmed the light that shone on that idea, why? Well because it seemed too big, like too much effort, who am I to do such a thing?! How on earth would I do it?! Pffft!

To be honest, fear took hold and made me turn my back on that idea. Choosing to instead focus on something more safe. (Errr hello! Fear based reaction!)

But after witnessing and sobbing and feeling the light in my heart ache when I saw this young girl, I felt inspired to write this. I'm putting it out to the universe to help guide me in the right direction.  I'm acting upon my souls whispers. This is my first step. I have no idea what the next will be. Thats ok.
But I'm not letting fear stop me xx

Please visit my website or Facebook page for more ways to contact me.
Www.kathrynpearson.co.uk
www.facebook.com/kathrynpearsoneft