So, You just NEVER get stressed?

A few times this week, I've had this conversation.

People are interested to know what I'm doing but when I tell them, their immediate reaction is to say something along the lines of:

"So you just never get stressed then?"

Whaaaaaat?!?!!? No I didn't say that.

And it dawned on me that people think what I do, what I'm about, is never being stressed; totally getting rid of stress. 

Living in the clouds and wistfully floating around in the world all happy and stress free and annoying.

Not true.

Getting rid of stress is not really an option. Living in the clouds - as much as I'd like to - isn't an option either.

Stress, fast paced lifestyles and set backs are part of life. We need stress to keep us alive.

'Stress' in the form of fear keeps me going! If it wasn't for fear I wouldn't feel like I was doing what I was supposed to be doing. 


I certainly GET STRESSED!

"Stress" or more specifically the Fight and Flight response, is a vital human survival mechanism and without it we would die - simple. But in todays world the Fight and Flight response and the sympathetic nervous system are in a constant state of 'on'. 

And its that 'on' state that makes it really hard for us to switch off and relax and feel like we can cope with all of life challenges. So when something comes along which is quite scary - like an exam you really need to pass - your ability to cope with the stress it creates is unbearable.


So what I do ? What I'm really passionate about:

I teach young people to calm their sympathetic nervous system (stress response) through pranayama, (breathing), yoga movements and EFT, so that you can deal with stress and be more resilient to stressful situations.

Helping you deal with life's challenges.

Helping you to be able to cope better with stress. 

Which in turn helps:

Change your perceptions.

Gets you to think differently. Be happier. More in control. More confident. 

Be amazing. Making a difference in the world. Doing what you love - which in turn lights up the world.

That.

Its not about living a stress free life, (like, who can actually do that?!) it's about learning how to deal with stress and worry, effectively and mindfully so that life's stress or humps in the road don't drag you down, control your life and make you hide away, just like I did. 

Yoga and EFT have helped create massive changes in my life and helped me learn to deal with daily stresses. 

And believe me - I have a 4 year old, money worries, I worry about if I'm good enough, if what I'm working on and towards will be any good, will it all just fail? 

Every time I press 'publish' I get a wave of annoying doubt; "will anyone read it this time? What will-so and-so think?" 

But I learned vital tools and techniques which help me deal with these emotions and thoughts. 

And ALL I wish is that I'd learned how to do that earlier in my life! So thats why I love helping young women like you, learn these tools and techniques, so you don't hide away and let stress, worry and fear keep you small, stuck and hidden.

Its not a quick fix and it can't be done just once. It takes commitment and determination to change. 

Taking care of your emotional well-being during your adolescent years is crucial to avoid mental health problems, such as depression and anxiety disorders, and physical health challenges such as IBS, Headaches, inflammation and other stress related illness in your adulthood.

Prevention is better than the cure ;)

If you want to know more about working with me email info@kathrynpearson.co.uk for affordable packages and classes.

What will they think? How to stop caring what people think about you.

Everything is going great, you're excited about something new happening, you're looking forward to the future, you get a new outfit, you realise you fancy someone; then BAM, your stomach sinks and you remember, them.

That person; who judges you, has something to say about every. single. thing. you do, say, wear, eat, drink...

Sometimes they don't even say anything - you know they're judging you, you can pick up on their thoughts, you know they're laughing about you behind your back.

THEM.

"What will they think? What will they say?" And more importantly who will they say it to and in front of?

 Learning to ignore what people think of you feels like a never ending struggle.

But, IT DOESN'T HAVE TO BE THIS WAY!

I spent a huge amount of time worrying about what people thought of me and I limited my life, so that I could avoid embarrassment, judgements and ridicule. 

So here are some tips to help you care less about what other people think and deal with the crap that comes with it...

1. It's not your job to know what every single person thinks.

Hands down the best advice I have ever been given is: "It's none of your business what other people think of you, its only your own opinion of yourself that matters." 

And this could not be more right. 

Who cares what Debbie from Maths thinks of you? Whatever you think she thinks, its probably wrong. Nobody truly knows what another person is thinking - you can't control it anyway - so stop letting it control you. 

•  Next time you catch yourself wondering what someone thinks of you say to yourself "It is none of my business what they think of me, I am amazing and that's all that matters!" (or something similar if 'amazing' is a bit cringe - but you are!)

NB: If someone openly judges or criticises you, then know this - when people judge you, they are usually judging something they dislike about themselves. 

So what they dislike about you - they dislike about themselves. It is so easy to outwardly project a judgement onto someone else. Its not about you, its about them.

2. When people are just mean - piss taking and 'banter'. 

Oh the joyous work of 'BANTER'. People seem to think that if they label bullying as "banter" then it's ok. It's not. 

When people actively take part in banter, bullying, piss taking etc it usually means one of two things: 

1. Firstly - They want your attention; whether it's because they fancy you or they simply want a reaction out of you.

Communicating with members of the opposite/same sex is scary shit. 

If only they knew the way to your heart was kindness. 

Most adolescents are insecure, they play up to the crowd and try to hide their feelings from their mates. 

If they are that annoying - just have a word with them, tell someone, don't speak to them, ignore them, break away from the group, don't put up with it and don't take what they say to heart.

2. Secondly - you make them insecure about themselves, they're jealous of you in some way or they are dissatisfied/unhappy with their own life - making you miserable makes them feel better.

 Harsh but true. 

The loudest most outwardly confident people are quite often the most insecure and unhappy people. Take a second to have some compassion for how they must be feeling to want to make you feel so bad. What must their life be like for them to want to treat you this way? 

I'm not for a second saying you should  put up with 'bullying' just because they're having a hard time; not at all. But realising that it's not about you, its about them, takes some of their power away, making it harder for them to hurt you.

• Next time some banter is going down take a step back and ask 'Is it likely he/she could fancy me or want my attention?', or 'Whats going on for them that's making them treat me so badly?' Send some compassion and love their way and release what they say - its not about you - its them. 

3. Know yourself

If we constantly adapt our lives to fit in, to make sure we are not picked on or stand out, we never get to know who we truly are. 

Each one of us has a purpose for being here in this world at this time - the problem is we forget what it is we are here to do. 

What do you love to do? What lights you up? What makes your heart swell? What are you naturally good at? What did you do easily and freely as a child? 

We are all unique and celebrating that uniqueness is crucial to being happy and releasing what other people think about you. 

What is it you are truly good at? What lights you up? If there were no limits, what would you choose to do with your life. DO THAT, no matter how crazy it seems - do it. 

Lastly - Imagine a white light around you, encircling you and protecting you. It only allows love in and out. Imagine this white light around you when you need protection from hurtful words. It's your energetic seal and once you get practised at imagining it around you, the stronger it will get. 

Also try using these affirmations: 

"Kindness flows out of me and to me, kindness is all around me."

"It's not about me, it's about them, I am safe."

"I choose loving and supportive friends - I am worthy"

Namaste.

Have you downloaded my FREE de-stress meditation recording? It's a free audio file which you can download straight to your phone/device. The feedback so far has been amazing - helping relax and sent so many people to sleep!!! 

If you're stressed or struggling to sleep; check it out here >> http://bit.ly/1JHyPnA

www.kathrynpearson.co.uk
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I will not ever do that again...

This time last year life was pretty exciting. I had decided I was going to quit my job to follow my dreams of helping people.

I knew I had more to give and I knew my heart wasn't in my current role as a School Teacher.

I'd discovered EFT - this amazing energetic therapy and it was transforming my life and the lives of my (few) clients.

I started out in January trying to help women with EFT and their struggle with weight and food.

It seemed logical.

Many 'people' had told me this was a lucrative and potentially successful area of business which would help me transition out of my job.

It seemed to use my skills and talents and even to some extent, my passions.

But it didn't feel quite right.

It didn't feel in alignment with my core desires or feelings. It felt a bit ikky.

Inside I was in turmoil. As the weeks passed and I got ZERO clients, I became more and more desperate to course correct and change what I was doing. My blogs were awful. I wasn't writing from the heart. I felt foolish and stupid.

I knew nothing about blogging, nothing about leadpages or growing my list, nothing about vlogs, Facebook ads, starting a YouTube channel, had little experince of working intuitively with EFT, I didn't listen to my intuition very often, I pushed and pushed myself, I didn't really meditate, I lived mostly out of my ego, I didn't do art or wasn't creative as often as I should be, I didn't take time for myself,  I didn't do yoga enough, I didn't breathe properly.

Don't get me wrong... I was learning and making huge steps in January 2015 (and previously in 2014), but I was in a very different place to now.

Thankfully in January 2015 I did something profoundly mind blowing for me. I took a whole 3 evenings and a full weekend away from my family and did a meditation/breathing course with the Art of Living. It was hard pushing through the "I can't leave my family/I feel so guilty/I can't afford it/I'm not good enough" fears!

However: (and I don't say this lightly)

It. Changed. My. Life.

Literally layers of my ego were shed .. by literally I mean I actually saw them evaporate away, leaving my body, disappearing up into the light.

I gained a clear insight into my desires and roots of my frustrations. 

I heard my inner voice loud and clear.

Be authentic

Be adventurous

Help the girls

Shine your light

Use your talents

We are all one

Love. Love yourself. Love others. Love.

It changed me on an energetic level. Life was never the same after that course. I still bang in a out it today because it was profoundly moving for me.

And then in March 2015 I wrote this blog http://eepurl.com/bgPaMz

It was one of the most scary things ever, but reading it back makes me cry with joy.

I told to my 'followers' (aka the world!) that I was changing course and focusing on teenagers. I'd spent the last 7 years with teenagers and I knew how much stress ruled their lives. I knew deep down my mission in life was to help them - teach them exactly what I'd learnt. 

I felt free, liberated, in tune and in the flow. Perfectly in alignment with what I was put here to do.

So March it all changed.  But I had NO idea how it was going to work. 

I kept getting all entangled in plans and more plans. What was I going to do? I had no idea.

But I was blessed with this inner faith and knowing that it was all going to be OK.

All because of my dedicated spiritual practice. 

Daily meditation was at the root of this. I started off doing my Kriya (breathing practice) which I learnt during the Art of Living course for 40 days following my course. But it was full on, fitting it into my busy working/home life was a struggle. I gave gratitude everyday, filling every page of my gratitude journal of 2015. Up until about November I did it religiously every night.  Every night!

Part way through the year the angels called me too! Me and a few of my hardcore tribe soul friends came across some amazing Doreen Virtue angel meditations and I listened to them everyday. I let go. I trusted and I enjoyed every moment of each day.  I felt supported and loved in a very new way. 

Now mid July I still had no clue how I was going to fulfil my dreams of helping teens. EFT seemed the best option at the time and I poured my heart into gaining clients and building my list, Facebook ads and blog writing.

I sent out a very scary blog article to a Blogger site and it was accepted! My very scary and personal  'story' was shared with the world! Find the link to it here: http://eepurl.com/bsBkiH

In August, after finishing Rebbecca Campbell's book, Light is the new black,  I felt confident enough to come out of my spiritual closet and I shared that in this blog - http://eepurl.com/bxg7Ln

I discovered I'm an empath, a highly sensitive person and even deeper than that, an intuitive highly sensitive.

For years I've thought something was wrong with me but it turns out I'm sensitive! Now if getting to know yourself on that kind of level isn't an achievement I don't know what is!

Each time I connected to my inner voice (my soul whispers or my 'intuition') I kept getting the same response:

"Be patient, all is well,  it's coming, we're working it all out for you, keep doing what you're doing, be patient, trust, allow, let go of the outcome"

I'm being serious - EVERY TIME! The same response.

So even in my desperation to know what the outcome was going to be, the only answers I ever got were ones of "just chill Kathy,  it's all fine." 

So I did.

I can't imagine what a state I would have got myself in, or what I would have done out of desperation had I not listened to those whispers. It seemed bonkers to everyone else - but I just kept my cool, chilled and trusted.

One morning in late August I came across a link to Charlotta Martinus' Teen yoga programme.

Ta-dah! Pivotal life moment alert.

I know wholeheartedly this wouldn't have come my way if I hadn't had created the space for it. If I hadn't trusted and let go of the outcome.

So the end of November comes. I'd had a stockpile of clients, written lots more of my book, completed my Teen Yoga training, marketed and carried out some Teen Yoga sessions, been briefly involved with Each Amazing Breath, been in meetings with local colleges and schools about Teen Yoga sessions and even written my most scariest and successful blog/article - which you can find here www.heysigmund.com/anxiety-or-highly-sensitive/ 


My head was spinning and I needed a break.

But the thing is I 'took a break' from everything. My whole spiritual practise broke down. I felt like I was the arm of a record player skipping over and over a record. Stuck. Replaying the same old crackly tune.

Which made the end of 2015 really, really hard. Hard to be positive. Hard to celebrate. Hard to recognise all the achievements of possibly my most exciting, inspiring and transformative year ever. I felt as though I was stuck in thick sludge and there was nothing or no one that could save me.

Writing this has been so cathartic for me.

I wasn't even sure I was going to publish this, I mean, who needs to hear THIS?!

But then something from my Time hop made me sit up and take notice. This time last year (and every year for the past 7) I was sitting at my desk MARKING A Level coursework - I hated it. I remembered very strongly how much I hated it. It was like a smack in the face - sit up and realise how far you've come! Sit up and acknowledge all that you've done, achieved and accomplished.  Sit up and bloody realise how amazing you are!!

I remember promising myself "I will not ever do this ever again - ever!"

And thats coming true.

I pushed through my ego fear of caring whether people want/need to hear this. My year was so transformational because I listened to my inner voice and wrote what it guided me to. And that helped people. It inspired people and it allowed me to feel in the flow. 

It doesn't matter if Im the only person to ever read this. It will go where it needs to go. I'm not attached to the outcome and 2015 taught me that.

My 2016 started with lots of meditation, gratitude and connecting with my soul whispers and I can safely say it will end that way too.

Thank you 2015. You were amazing. And I mean amazing. So much more has happened and unravelled and I'm so in love with my journey. I'm so in love with the soul who I am. I'm forever grateful.

www.kathrynpearson.co.uk

info@kathrynpearson.co.uk

www.facebook.com/kathrynpearsoneft

"Its not my hormones its my amygdala!"

It's Not My Hormones, It's My Amygdala!

Tired, moody, angry, impulsive, hungry, off-balance, gangly, awkward, curious…

All make up the tell tale signs of adolescence; your teenage years.

How often are your mood swings, rages and impulsive behaviour put down to simply 'hormones' without any real proper explanation? Weekly? Daily? Hourly?!

Your teenage years are pretty much the most confusing and bewildering times of your life and to simply be told 'Oh it's just your hormones', is quite frankly - misleading and disempowering.

Recent advances in neuroscience have dramatically changed the way we understand adolescent behaviour and learning this new information during my TeenYoga training was mesmerising and truly mind blowing. I just HAD to share it.

You see, while your hormones play a pivotal role in your adolescent behaviour and appearance, they are not entirely to blame for your behaviour and emotional reactions.

Your brain development is.

During adolescence, the brain undergoes a huge process of maturation. I've learned that the brain grows from back to front, and the front part of the brain, (the pre-frontal cortex) which is responsible for 'the moderation of "correct" behaviour in social situations, impulse control, moderating intense emotions, stopping inappropriate behaviour, for seeing possible consequences of behaviour etc; all what I like to call "adult behaviour", is last to develop and mature - usually around the age of 25.

So until then, until this 'master of all adult behaviour' part of your brain develops, you process emotional 'stuff' through your amygdala. 

My what now?!

Your amygdala - a small part of the brain nestled securely in your mid-brain.

Unfortunately for you, the amygdala is the emotional centre of the brain.

These two crucial pieces of information (the fact that your pre-frontal cortex is still developing and that you're using the amygdala to process emotional stuff) may explain why you react a little on the crazy and impulsive side when it comes to emotional processing. 

It's not my hormones, it's all to do with my brain then?

Partly true, while the neuroscience research is groundbreaking in explaining your behaviour, your hormones do have a part to play.

For example, oestrogen needs to be balanced to prevent mood swings, progesterone when imbalanced can cause sluggishness, depression, weepiness and crying, sugar cravings and poor concentration and testosterone can cause aggression.

Hormones are indeed essential for your growth from a child into an adult; oestrogen, progesterone and testosterone are all essential for your physical development (growth of muscle, bone density, public hair, widening of the hips, decent of the testes, breastfeeding growth) as well as performing crucial roles during conception, fertilisation and pregnancy; so they shouldn't be looked upon as 'annoying chemicals which make me act in a weird way and that make me feel so crappy', but rather essential chemicals which enable your body to function correctly. 

The way you treat them is super important.

Your hormones and their glands, aka the testes, the ovaries, adrenal, pituitary, pancreas, thymus, thyroid, hypothalamus and pineal; (known as the endocrine system) are some of the most important and vital parts of your body, and while yes, if unbalanced they can cause significant mood changes and aggression, it is still your brain which controls your behaviour.

You are also developing huge amounts of white matter in the corpus callosum - which connects the left and right parts of the brain - this means that you're developing ways of thinking creatively, analytically and devising strategies for coping with life's challenges. 

You simply haven't yet mastered the adult world and how to control your behaviour.

To your parents, teachers or older siblings, your behaviour seems totally irrational - it's like they have forgotten what it feels like to be a teenager, but trust me, they felt this way too! And to any parents, teachers or older siblings reading this - remember how you felt as a teenager? Remember how tough it was?

Another major part of growing up is learning how to assess risks and consequences. Teenagers are risk takers because they have to be. You're learning what you can and can't do, what you can and can't say to who and when and in what manner. Your brain is learning how to be.. it's that simple.

So how can I ensure my hormones are balanced?

The Endocrine system is made up of glands; each secrete a hormone and they tirelessly work to keep your body in a natural state. However external influences (alcohol, drugs, sugar, diet, stress) can all cause hormonal imbalances, which in turn make the symptoms 100 times worse.

Getting a varied diet full of grains, vegetables and fruits is essential and stimulating the glands with yoga postures can help their regulation. Keeping stress free and getting lots of rest makes sure your body, and more importantly your endocrine system, can work correctly.

Annoyingly true - but being healthy and partaking in activities such as yoga, are the best way to make sure your hormones stay balanced and work correctly. You're still going to get mood swings, weepy, aggressive and tired; but learning about this gives you the power back. 

A yoga class is the perfect way to deepen your understanding of your self. Learning ways to manage and observe emotions and understanding your own body are pivotal parts of a TeenYoga class.

I was lucky enough for this blog to be published by my Teen Yoga Training school - you can find the full blog post including "A Message From Your Brain" HERE 

A Message From Your Teenage Brain

Full Moon - I've surrendered and I've grounded

Today I took myself off for some self healing. After a tough week I just knew the only thing for me was to connect to nature. As I took deliberately grounding and purposeful steps on the muddy, wet ground I felt an instant connection.

I stopped off with various trees and checked in; touching the rough, woody bark and absorbing the rooted, grounded energy.

Something called me to the water. As I walked towards it I felt again, instantly at peace. The familiar woodland and moss covered rocks lined my path made me sense a connection and stirred up memories of times before. The water today was different; lighter in colour and flowing vivaciously down under the bridge where it settled into a quiet pool. The colours of the water were lighter and more aqua marine than usual. I closed my eyes and listened to the rushing water. I took time to connect to mother earth, the surrounding sounds making it familiar once again.

Thanking myself, I walked back to reality with a calmer and more grounded head.

 The mood still hasn't lifted but I feel a sense of what I needed is now within me.

On this full moon,  take time to ground yourself and feel connected to mother earth. Embrace your feminine and allow the waves of emotion to flow through you. Don't fight it today.

Happy Full Moon. Let this be a reflective time for you. Rest and listen to the whispers of your heart.

Namaste x

The Importance of Breath

If you didn't already know I've just completed my Teen Yoga training! This qualifies me to teach mindfulness techniques and Yoga to teens; this is SO huge for me! It's practically my dream job.

Yogic principles, for me, embody everything for a well balanced, fulfilled, happy and healthy life. But one aspect sticks out for me and it always has done; pranayama - breathing.

Why is breathing so important and what are the benefits?

It's evidenced that practicing pranayama (breath control) can promote greater concentration and mental focus, reduce fatigue, reduced anxiety and depression, lower blood pressure, increase energy levels, allow muscle relaxation, decrease feelings of stress and overwhelm. 

(http://www.chopra.com/ccl/breathing-for-life-the-mind-body-healing-benefits-of-pranayama)

Which is massive! From just controlling the breath you can affect the body in hugely beneficial ways. Its mind blowing to see the impact breathing could have on the wider community and population; which is the reason for me banging on about it now :)

Controlling my breath gives me such a sense of control. When I feel like everything is buzzing around me and I can't control what's going on; I connect to my breath and control it. 

It is said that "To control the breath is to control the mind" and I couldn't agree more. Not only does controlling my breath give me a feeling of control, I have noticed I sleep better, have more awarenes of my own 'self' and my feelings and this gives me greater control over how I act and react to situations, people and my 'stresses'.

I also notice a reduction in IBS symptoms; which is always a bonus. 

How can I breathe correctly and control my breath?

How often do you breathe properly? Notice your breath now, is it shallow, fast, slow, barely moving past the top half of your ribs? Which parts of the lungs is the oxygen flowing to?

Full Yogic breath consists of bringing the breath down into the belly area (diaphragmatic breathing), expanding the ribs outwards (thoracic breathing) and filling the top part of the lung, around the collar bone (clavicular) in one smooth, full deep breath. Then allowing the breath to be let go in reverse order; top, then ribs, then tummy.

The best way to do this is to lie down and inhale through your nose; take a few deep breaths and then inhale into the tummy, followed by the chest; feel the ribs expand, lastly fill the top part of your lung. Pause then exhale contracting the ribs and then the tummy, making the exhale slightly longer than the inhale. Try breathing in for 4 and out for 6.

Try 5 breaths like this and see how you feel. It can make people dizzy momentarily as the body isn't used to receiving so much oxygen. Try up to 10 breaths and check in with how you feel. You may only need to do this once a day, but you can do it as often as you like throughout your day.

If this can't be done, due to circumstance, I personally just do tummy breathing whenever I can - so if Im going somewhere and I feel nervous, I quietly breathe in through my nose and expand my tummy, breathing out through my nose and allowing my tummy to fully contract; exhaling all the stale air from my lungs making my exhale longer than my inhale.

I also use this practice to check in with how I'm feeling, which is useful for me as a sensitive! 

If you're local to me (Dinnington/Anston/S25/S26) and you would like to attend a Stress busting session or a Yoga lesson please get in touch via email info@kathrynpearson.co.uk

Kathryn Pearson is an EFT practitioner and Teen Yoga Teacher specialising in helping sensitive teens and young women combat stress, fear and worry. Her mission is to give the next generation the confidence and tools to break free from negative thinking and be able to follow their dreams, using EFT, a meridian energy therapy, often referred to as tapping, and other successful positive mindset practises and strategies.  Visit her website www.kathrynpearson.co.uk or contact info@kathrynpearson.co.uk

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